Earlier today, we shared the first blog from Sam Role on Married At First Sight: The First Year. Now, we bring you her blog on last night’s episode of FYI’s Bride and Prejudice. Here it is, below.
Bride and Prejudice Season 1 Episode 3 Sam Role Exclusive
So this show really hits home for me and there are several reasons why. As I’m sure you all may know, I am Jewish, Panamanian, and Caucasian. My father is Jewish and my mother is Latin. When my parents met, my mother was of the Catholic faith and my father grew up under the Jewish faith. My dad had a Bar Mitzvah, studied the Torah, and went to temple regularly. Even when I was growing up, I went to Temple and Hebrew school. My grams was always so big on me finding a Jewish man to marry. My gramps actually migrated from Russia to the United States with his mother, father and brother in 1918 when he was 2 ½ years old. Both my grandparents are Jewish and instilled that faith in their children. I tell you these things because I know what it’s like to grow up in a family with a deep rooted faith in Judaism. I am also quite aware of the persecution the Jews endured in Egypt, as well as during WWII. I am proud to be Jewish. That’s the only faith I know. I’m also proud to be Latin and Caucasian. Again, I don’t know anything different.
My first language was Spanish and if you had told me that being of mixed race was not acceptable, I would’ve looked at you like you were crazy. I dealt with racism growing up. I was picked on for being Latin in many towns that I lived in. I was a military brat, so I moved around to many places. I remember when I lived in Missouri as a little girl, I was in elementary school and a group of girls wrote a cruel note picking on me for looking different. I was extremely confused and it wasn’t until I became an adult that I realized what the root cause of their ridicule really was. Bride and Prejudice pulls on my heart strings because two of the couples are living through something that is the only thing I know as a way of life. It kills me to see these families being so unkind to their relatives. Their ignorance is based on their own personal feelings and opinions and it’s sad.
Lou & Chris
What a cute couple! I love these two. They are truly enamored with each other and I have to say that I respect Angela, Chris’ sister. I know that she isn’t really comfortable with the marriage between her brother and another man, but she is still there for both Chris and Lou. I want to give her a pat on the back and tell her that I am so proud of her actions. She meets with Lou to discuss their current issues prior to marriage and she’s concerned because they are fighting so close to the wedding day, but she gives him the best advice she can!
Look, I know this may not have been the way she saw her brother getting married, but she loves him and just wants him to be happy at the end of the day. Her actions speak louder than her words. I’m so disappointed with Chris’ brothers and father. Chris invites them to his bachelor party and both brothers (twins) and his father decided not to come. I don’t know what the actual reasoning was, but I think that is just so insensitive. What some people are too ignorant to understand is that if you love someone, you love them for who they are. This is extremely pertinent when it comes to family. You gave life to this person, they are your sibling, your family, your blood. How can you just deny them love or acceptance because they don’t meet your criteria of who they should be with? Your son loves another man, SO WHAT?! They aren’t drug dealers, or gang bangers, or addicts, or murderers, or rapists, or anything vile! They are two men in love.
If Chris’ parents were told that they couldn’t marry each other because his mom wasn’t Latin, I’m sure his parents wouldn’t agree. It’s the same thing in my eyes. I also have to give a shout out to Lou’s mom. When she said that she knew Lou was gay when he asked her to buy him dolls at a young age and she bought him dolls, I wanted to give her a HUGE hug! This woman is amazing and a blessing to Chris and Lou, as well as the world and her generation. She accepts him for who he is and only loves him more. Parents can really hinder or enhance a child’s life. Poor Chris had to live in the dark about who he is and feels embarrassed or insecure about his sexual orientation and it’s because his parents and brothers want him to feel something he doesn’t feel for women. I can’t understand how PARENTS could do this to their children. Understand, we are all different people and if your son decides to love men and wants to marry a man, then you need to move past how YOU feel about it and love him for who HE is. Be proud that he isn’t some horrible person and accept that he loves a man! He isn’t doing anything wrong. I know that Lou was upset that Chris didn’t stand up for him when his mom was unkind to him, and I feel Lou on that. Chris, be proud of who you are and be proud to stand up for your man- even if it’s to your mother! Do it in a respectful way, of course, but you stand up for your man and own your voice. Both Chris and Lou seem to be pretty amazing men and I feel the love between them. That’s undeniable.
Adam & Briana
This couple is so cute! You can tell that Briana and Adam really love each other and are happy together. Watching this couple makes me excited about love. Adam is really trying to get to know Briana’s family and Briana is very close to her cousin Ashlyn. Ashlyn refuses to go to Briana’s wedding or be her maid of honor because Adam is Caucasian. Ashlyn says in the first episode that Briana is very close to her family and that if her family doesn’t approve of the wedding that the wedding may not happen. She, then, also says that if she doesn’t accept the invite to her wedding that Briana won’t marry Adam. This infuriates me to no end. Ashlyn is trying to manipulate Briana’s actions by refusing to go to the wedding in hopes that Briana doesn’t marry the man that she loves. How can you be so selfish? This is your cousin. ]
Look, I don’t know the path that Ashlyn has walked because I have never walked a day in her shoes. I know that racism is still prevalent in certain areas and that Ashlyn was really affected by it when she was growing up (rightfully so), but two wrongs don’t make a right. I wish Ashlyn could rise above the race issue and see what Adam is bringing to the table as Briana’s soon-to-be husband. We did see Ashlyn crack a little when Briana invited her to her birthday party where it will be just Adam, Briana and Ashlyn. Ashlyn says that she will go because birthdays are important.This makes me question her motives in regards to Briana marrying a white man. Is it that Ashlyn is ok going to the birthday with Adam and Briana because it’s not permanent and it’s just a birthday or is it that Ashlyn feels like maybe she will be losing her best friend when Briana gets married to Adam and she’s looking for any reason to prevent her marrying someone? Is it really about race? I guess I’m kind of hoping it’s the latter.
Either way, Ashlyn is willing to sit and speak with Adam alone. I get the feeling that she thinks Briana is speaking for Adam when she asks questions, so she wants to make sure that Adam really isn’t racist or isn’t ignorant to the differences in their races. I am just glad to see that Ashlyn is willing to make some sort of positive effort to get to know this man beyond the color of his skin. Sorry girl, but love sees no color, sex, or religion. You don’t have to agree with your cousin’s choices, but love her for who she is and what she chooses to do with her life. It’s not unhealthy or damaging to her so why not look past your own personal choices and let your cousin make her own and support her 100%.
Eugene & Sam
Ok so this couple is patient and already working through some serious commitments that have taken place. They have a family that include a cute and darling little boy! That baby is adorable! So, Eugene’s family is extremely against him marrying a woman who is not Jewish. We see this season begin with Eugene’s family being extremely closed off and rude to Samantha’s family because of religious differences. Sure, Samantha’s family is not very knowledgeable of Eugene’s religion, but they are accepting of it and are just happy that they believe in God. As I watch Eugene’s family approach their feelings of him marrying outside of their religion, I see something that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. As his family is describing why they don’t want Samantha marrying Eugene, it sounds as if they think their son is better than marrying someone who is not Jewish. That kills me!
Jews have gone through so much persecution because of their faith, appearance, or success and I feel like I’m watching some of those same things happen to Samantha. No religion should separate people from loving someone of different faith. Samantha, bless her heart, is even considering converting to Judaism but doesn’t want to do it for the wrong reasons. As a Jew, I respect that. As a human, I respect that. As a person of faith, I respect that. She doesn’t just want to say ‘Ok ill convert so your family will accept me!’ She wants to convert because she understands and believes in the faith. That’s commendable. I was the same way when I married a man of different faith. I didn’t want him to convert for the sake of converting and I didn’t want to convert for the sake of converting. I just didn’t feel that it would be respectful to either faith or what we believed in if we just changed what we believed just to make someone else happy.
Samantha is awkward during the prayers at Shabbat dinner. I’m Jewish and sometimes I even say that it can be overwhelming, but it’s so very important to understand all the prayers and what they mean to our religion. I think that Samantha loves Eugene so much that she will put her effort into learning the prayers and respecting them as her own. Eugene and Samantha decide to have a Jack and Jill Bachelor and Bachelorette party and this leaves Eugene’s mom to care for Nate (the beautiful baby boy). At the party, Alex, Eugene’s brother, is invited and decides to take Eugene outside to try and “convince” him to change his mind about marrying Samantha. Claiming Eugene will be ruining his life by marrying someone who is not Jewish. I could slap him. Alex really gets under my skin because he is just so ignorant of his brother’s feelings and doesn’t have respect for Samantha or his brother. You even hear Alex’s girlfriend say that he is hard-headed and only feels that his way of thinking is the only right way. Alex’s girlfriend seems to be supportive of Samantha and Eugene’s decision to get married. Hold on to her Alex, she’s a keeper!
Eugene, you and Samantha are so patient and perfect for each other- keep the faith! I know that Eugene’s mom and dad have come off quite rude in the past couple of episodes, but I melted watching his mom this past episode. She finally saw the big picture through a small gift: Baby Nate. When Eugene and Samantha go back to Eugene’s mom’s house to pick up Nate you see his mom on another level. She is relaxed and so loving of this blessing that Samantha and Eugene have blessed the world and their family with. This changes her views in regards to the difference in faith. She says that family is the most important thing and that spending time with Nate has helped her see this. I’m so proud of her, she is seeing the bigger picture. She wants the family to be together and I’m so happy to hear her say that. She’s being such a great bubby! You could really see her light up when she was with Nate. So amazing. Mom, get Alex on board please!
Make sure to check back next week for Sam’s next Bride and Prejudice blog and make sure to catch the show Tuesdays at 10 PM on FYI.