Jamie Otis Opens Up On Losing Her Baby Including Name
Last week, we reported that Married At First Sight star Jamie Otishad lost her baby via a miscarriage (read about that here). Now, Otis has opened up in her blog about how hard this last week has been on her and her husband, Doug Hehner. What did she have to say? Read on for details.
Jamie Otis Miscarriage Jamie Opens Up On Loss
Otis shared that, “It’s been less than a week since we have suffered from this terrible miscarriage. Last night my husband and I were making dinner and I just lost it. To think that a week ago there was a little baby curled up inside me warm and comfy, safe from the world. He could hear me talking to him and my heart beating next to his. I would rub my belly and smile knowing he was growing inside me. But now he is gone. I just can’t wrap my brain around it.”
“I’m trying to listen and ‘move on a bit’ but I just can’t quite figure out how to continue with every-day life,” she explained. “I just have no motivation to do anything. Yesterday I slept until 1 pm in the afternoon. When I woke up I didn’t want to get out of bed, but I took my pups for a long walk thinking that may help. I cried off and on. (My neighbors must think I’m crazy – I can hear ’em now ‘There goes that girl. Walking her dogs and crying.’) I told myself all the things that I’ve been hearing: ‘He’s in heaven safe and sound. God needed him and has bigger plans for him. Give it time and you will feel better. It wasn’t meant to be with this baby and you will understand later. He was sick and he would have had a very poor quality of life…etc.’ I just came home and fell on the couch in a big ball with silent tears streaming down my face.”
Luckily, her husband has been there for her, as Otis shared that, “Doug has been so good to me with all of this. He’s remained very strong while I’ve felt so weak. I’ve felt very lonely lately. I don’t know why because I have seen family and friends, but I just feel so alone. When Doug got home yesterday I was just a mess. (He seems to be able to continue with normal activities – he had a softball game in the morning. It’s so true when they say everyone copes differently.) I told him I was trying my best to be strong and remain positive but I just don’t even know how. He just wrapped his arms around me and let me cry.”
Otis also revealed that, “A few people who’ve reached out to us who’ve had a miscarriage said that naming their baby helped them cope.”
She went on to discuss that they “wanted to name our baby the perfect name. A name that is full of meaning, warmth, and love. He deserves a beautiful name to be remembered by.”
“We decided to name our baby boy Johnathan because he is truly a gift from God,” she wrapped with sharing. “We love him so much and cannot wait to one day be reunited with this little one. Doug’s middle name is Edward after his grandpa. Doug wanted to give him his middle name. Our firstborn will share daddy’s middle name. I think this is so beautiful and meaningful. I hope this little boy knows how much his mommy and daddy love him. Just because we had a miscarriage and lost him before we were even able to rock him and bounce him doesn’t take away the immense amount of love we have for him. We will never forget our little Johnathan Edward.”
Our heart truly breaks for Jamie and Doug, and we admire her for opening up in her blogs. As she shared in her last blog, writing is therapy, and we hope that she is finding some solace in it.