After last week’s fascinating blog from Twitter user @MAFS_Original (read that here), we have another great blog from them:
You should thank Heather.
I’m already anticipating the Twitter fury that will be directed my way for that. Indeed I dare to suggest that the windfall of disdain aimed at the seemingly LEAST popular participant of Married At First Sight should be redirected or, at the very least, reconsidered. However, as the moderator of the two largest social media fan accounts for the show (pushing 70,000!) I have seen and heard a thing or two.
Hear me out.
One of my very favorite things about being tagged in tens of THOUSANDS of tweets weekly is that it gives me a great barometer for what the fans REALLY think. I tend to suffer from a common disease called Everyone Probably Agrees With Me. It afflicts a large portion of the population and scientists have had a really difficult time finding a cure. It’s most severe for people in times of high pressure or stress such as, say, an election season. (Ha. Totally just mentioned the election. I can hear your blood pressure rising from here!) It’s been an adjustment to discover that everyone does NOT in fact agree with me at all times. Shocking I know.
The way I approach my fan accounts has evolved over time. I used to express my personal opinion a lot more. I’m only human and it really pissed me off when Ryan R. seemed to be giving Jaclyn a chance in Season 2 and she appeared to be entirely aloof. For a week or two my account couldn’t have been called pro-Jaclyn (Le oops!) But THEN Jaclyn finally opened up to Ryan,
“Can’t you SEE she’s TRYING you jerk?!” I yelled at my TV to the alarm of my neighbor and my dog (who I’m not sure why I bothered to name because he only answers to Stinky.) A handful of popcorn flew through the air for good measure.
In the current season I’ve enjoyed retweeting an interesting variety of fan opinions. I try to display a full picture of what everyone really thinks of the show. Obviously I couldn’t personally agree with every retweet but I like to get interesting conversations started (that or I have several FIERY personalities…you be the judge.)
Back to Heather. (Again…your blood pressure is SO rising!) Two quick points and you’ll be buying #HeatherForever t-shirts in bulk.
The Case For Heather:
I took some heat initially for allegedly only retweeting “negative tweets” about Heather. However, in my defense, I read thousands and thousands of tweets and found maybe a dozen “pro-heather” fans amongst them (which I promptly shared!) In short, the fans appeared to be pissed at Heather. Unfortunately, her apparent demeanor week after week did nothing to reassure them they were wrong.
Then, out of the blue, a couple weeks ago my husband Mike and I were watching MAFS and he said, “I’m team Heather.”
WAIT. WHA?! I began to have serious concerns about newlywed buyer’s remorse (my greatest fear going into my wedding recently!) What if he’s actually a closet JERK?! I paused…petted Stinky (my dog sleeps in my bed too Nick!) and asked him *GULP* Why. How could my own husband be Team Heather?! Why me!?!
Mike explained his case with annoying rationality. And I began to see. Every scene of Heather flashed before my eyes in a Married At First Sight montage that any 80’s movie editor would have been proud of.
Heather shopping for her dress, sweetly hopeful. Heather being comforted by her dad before the ceremony (their Peter Pan inside joke, adorable!) Heather walking down the aisle seemingly half frozen. The awkward wedding photos. And that honeymoon that was more like a mack truck barreling downhill with no breaks. WHAT. HAD. HAPPENED.
Then in a wave of shame it hit me.
What I (and arguably most of America) had mistaken for a permanent case of Resting B*tch Face was…fear. Pure. Unadulterated. Fear. I saw myself in Heather’s eyes and for the first time MY inner ice queen melted (insert witty animated gif) and I got it.
We are all our own worst enemy.
Relationships are a rollercoaster ride of risk. Not everyone avoids the nausea. Heather was open enough to finding love that she jumped into the DEEP end and realized too late that her swimming might not be as strong as she had anticipated. No shame in that.
There is what seems to be a general consensus that Heather should have stuck out the 6 weeks of the experiment. That may be so. However, she jumped in feet first to an ocean of possibility.
When was the last time you and I took a real risk, sink or swim, for love?
Written by: Becky (with the perfectly adequate hair)
TW: @MAFS_Original & IG: @_MarriedAtFirstSight_
(This is an opinion piece. The author and her social media accounts are unaffiliated with AETV & their sponsors)